What
causes a sense of emptiness, sometimes even after success ? How can we deal
with it ?
When you finally achieve a long-desired goal, how should
you be feeling ? Euphoric, excited, energized, full of plans – right ? This is
what you wanted, planned and worked hard for. Life from here on should be
satisfaying and happy.
And yet so many feel this gaping hole right after the
achievement of a goal – a void that belies the sense of success. It is almost
as if the striving and yearning was far more exciting than the prize that is in
your hands now. Young men and women who have been lucky enough to achieve their
hearts’ desire and get coveted job or academic assignment are suddenly at a loss,
feeling this deep sense of emptiness. They talk about it and the pain of that
emptiness pushes many into depression and a state of hopelessness.
What went wrong ?
The pursuit of the goal sometimes becomes so important that it become
one’s life – and without the task that has been completed now, one feels a deep
emptiness. These people have focused so hard on that one effort that they
forgot to enjoy life in all its nuances. Not just goals; there are also those
who after a day of hard work, instead of feeling relaxed and victorious,
experience a sense of desolation and emptiness.
This leads people to depression. But where does it come
from ? I think it is a result of being disconnected from one’s soul and the
purpose and meaning of life. Instead of exploring our own selves and living
life to its full potential, we choose to focus our strengths and attention on
worldly achievements that give us a
false sense of self-worth.
Doing better than others becomes more important than
doing the best that our potential allows. If we don’t do well in our chosen
pursuit, it leads to disillusionment and depression. So what good is it to us
if even success does not bring happiness and satisfaction ?
How then can we fight back that sense of emptiness and
suffocating nothingness ? one way is by gaining a good sense of self. Know yourself.
Understand what gives you happiness and fulfillment and stay engaged in these
areas. Who am I ? What gives me fulfillment ? The answers to these questions
will give you a true sense of the purpose of your life. Stay true to your
principles and sense of integrity. Learn to love yourself and keep evolving. Read.
Watch movies. Appreciate art. Be inspired by greater and more creative minds
than yours.
A sense of emptiness is also often the result of an
emotional disconnect. Some allow the ups and downs of relationships to make
them desolate and helpless, while others suppress their own emotions so much
that they stop feeling anything deeply enough, thus leading to unhappiness and
hopelessness. Allow yourself to feel deeply and express emotions freely.
It is also important to stay engaged with others. Make friends.
Stay connected. Create healthy relationships where you encourage each other’s
growth and give each other space. Relationships are very important to sustain
us and help us feel alive and relevant.
Creating and owning a passion is very important to one’s
personal evolution and fulfillment. A life without passion or dreams is a dull
and monotonous. What is your personal passion ? If you don’t know it, look for
it. What sets you afire, keeps you happily engaged ? Seek it and adopt it; you
will never feel empty again.
Do not pursue any one thing to the exclusion of all else,
even your very sense of self. Reward yourself along the way by indulging your
dreams, your passions, your relationships.
Having something interesting and rewarding to look forward to can help
you get through present hardships and loneliness, pep up your life and fill up
any sense of emptiness or isolation.
Comments